Sorry I Had to Rig Your GPS

“You have arrived,” the robotic voice intoned.

“I thought we were going to Jodi’s house?” she said as they pulled up to a man standing under cover of trees. An otherwise unnoteworthy location in the forest along the highway.

“You put in the address! I have no idea where we are,” he said putting the truck in park and turning to look at her pointedly. She had a habit of getting them lost, hence the use of GPS.

“Should we ask him for directions?” she asked pointing towards the man who appeared to be waiting for them. Impossible.

“I think we should ask him not to skin us. Seriously, Amy, this is getting ridiculous. I thought you said you’ve been using the GPS?”

“Seriously, Adam,” she said snidely, mockingly, her eyes squinting and her arms crossing her chest, “I have been, and aside from the impossibly long time it takes to put in an address, the thing has been quite helpful. Now, in this instance, and forever whatever reason it is not,” sighing she dropped her arms and picked up the surprisingly heavy little machine. “Maybe there’s a typo in the street or something,” she said as she began to fiddle with it.

She startled as the knock upon the window sounded. A sharp sound in the small space of the cab. She’d made a surprised sound as she inhaled, a sound that drove Adam crazy, and she looked towards him apologetically, before rolling down the window.

“I’m sorry I had to rig your GPS,” the man said, “but this is urgent.”

Afraid to turn away from the man at her window, who was clearly insane, Any reached her hand across the seat towards Adam, clenching his hand when she found it. Perhaps if I speak calmly and smile he won’t kill us, she thought, plastering a smile on her face. “Are you lost?” she asked, looking for another vehicle and not finding one, “broken down somewhere?”

“No, ma’am, I’m not lost and neither are you. Again, apologies for rigging your GPS, but this is an urgent matter,” he looked Amy directly in the eyes and she saw that he wasn’t crazy, or at least didn’t seem to be, he was quite serious and confident. She reminded him a bit of an FBI agent in a movie she’d seen recently.

“I’m sorry, I think I misunderstood, you rigged my GPS?” she asked, “I didn’t, I mean, I don’t,” stumbling for the words she ultimately blurted, “how is that even possible?”

“Well, ma’am, you see, we’ve been trying to reach you about your vehicles extended warranty.”

Apologies to everyone who reads this. I’m so, so, so, so, SO sorry. This was terrible. It was. I know this. These prompts though…this is not my kind of writing, but I’m giving it my best…until today. This was not my best. But I hope I made you laugh. -sunday

This #writethirtyminutes session was prompted very loosely from “A Year of Writing Prompts” by Writer’s Digest, available here

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