Reaching Out

Reaching Out

Writing is blissfully/cursedly solitary work. There’s no one that can tell me if I’m on the right track or help me through a sticking point, not really. There are some things I have to trust myself on, wait for the connection to be made in my brain, the click to occur.

There are other things having a writing network can help with. Questions about best practices, event meet-ups, having someone who can hear a complaint without shrugging their shoulders in an inability to empathize.

When I started writing, I was thrilled with the solitariness, I still am. But occasionally, I’d want someone to tell me they too stared out a window in an effort to make the words come. Or that they too had moments where they felt like they were just spinning their wheels, an entire day doing social media because they couldn’t face their manuscript. Someone to agree that these temporary distractions from the work are just that: temporary, and that they’re also oddly essential to the process.

We don’t recognize when our subconscious is working through something our conscious can’t quite see yet.

In an effort to build my network, I did something potentially stupid and inadvisable. I don’t know, I’m not sure. The jury is still out, because it’s been mostly amazing, although I did have one person suspect me of being a scammer 😂

Here’s what I did:

I googled “authors in (my state)” – so Montana, in this case

Then I started a spreadsheet where I listed these people’s first and last names, their websites (as I found them), their email addresses, etc. And I sent them an email, either using their email or through their website’s contact page. My email wasn’t fantastic (clearly it wasn’t if I had one person think I was a scammer), and possibly more because not everyone responded to me.

The email itself was simple. No more than three sentences. A greeting by name, a statement that I am also a writer in their state, that I look forward to reading their book(s), and that I hoped we’d meet in person some day at a workshop, reading, or event, closing with contact info.

Did I really expect to hear from anybody? Yes and no. I figured some of them would drop a quick “hey” and others would ignore me. What I did not expect was to have several of these writers reach back.

Several authors sent me a paragraph or more in response. A few asked me to meet up for coffee or lunch if I was ever in their area. A couple have remained in touch and I hear from them every month or so. Some I’ve since had the privilege to meet in person at various events. And some I follow on all the socials and it feels a bit like following a friend, and not a just a writing mentor or hero.

Should you do what I did? I dunno…it probably depends on what state you live in. I happen to live in a place where people know their neighbors by name and flick a wave to one another when passing in the street. Perhaps in another state it wouldn’t work.

If I had to do it all again, I’d probably wait until after I’d read their book to contact them. That way I could have said how much I liked it or what specifically I liked about it.

I still add to my spreadsheet as I meet other writers in the area and/or read a book from a Montana writer I hadn’t previously heard from.

Probably the only reason I heard from as many writers as I did and received such genuinely lovely responses, is that I undertook this exercise from a genuine and vulnerable place. This little exercise wasn’t undertaken as a way to further my career, to ask for blurbs, or to make myself sound cool. I could have reached out to ANY writers, not just in my state. Go big or go home, right? I could have reached out to Stephen King! But that would have felt disingenuous. As a teenager obsessed with everything he wrote? Genuine. As an adult who doesn’t read horror? Fake.

If you’re looking for a writer network, it’s not a bad idea. There’s probably a less archaic way to go about it. Especially with the new Threads app that allows you to use tags like #WriterThreads (hugely popular). Whatever you do, if you’re looking for community, the best way to proceed is now. Decide what you want to do and do it. Follow writers on Threads. Follow agencies on Facebook. Follow publishers on Instagram.

Do something to ensure you have a network when you need one. Even if they’re strangers now, they won’t be forever, unless you give up on your dream, and having a network may just help you follow it.

Top 20 Books In 2023

Top 20 Books in 2023

Every year I set a reading goal and hope to beat it, and every year I wish I had a list of books that would suck me in or teach me something or leave me feeling excited for the next read. And every year I read the “Best of” lists and hope for the best. So here’s one more!

These were my top 20 favorite books read in 2023 (not necessarily published in 2023!). Enjoy!

  • Tom Lake — Ann Patchett
  • A Wolf at the Table — Augusten Burroughs
  • Tiny Beautiful Things: Advice on Love and Life from Dear Sugar — Cheryl Strayed
  • Descended from a Travel-worn Satchel — Chris LaTray
  • One-Sentence Journal: Short Poems and Essays From the World At Large — Chris LaTray
  • Foster — Claire Keegan
  • This Time Tomorrow — Emma Straub
  • Blow Your House Down: A Story of Family, Feminism, and Treason — Gina Frangello
  • Breath: The New Science of a Lost Art — James Nestor
  • Braided Creek — Jim Harrison, Ted Kooser
  • Girl in Pieces — Kathleen Glasgow
  • Body Work — Melissa Febos
  • This Is Happiness — Niall Williams
  • A Little More about Me — Pam Houston
  • Contents May Have Shifted — Pam Houston
  • My Grandmother’s Hands: Racialized Trauma and the Pathway to Mending Our Hearts and Bodies — Resmaa Menakem
  • The Thursday Murder Club (Series) — Richard Osman
  • The Creative Act: A Way of Being — Rick Rubin
  • When Women Were Birds: Fifty-four Variations on Voice — Terry Tempest Williams
  • The Rabbit Hutch — Tess Gunty

I’ve also created a Bookshop account to make finding these easier (although some of them were not available there) and to (hopefully) get a small kickback if you decide to purchase any of these there. As always, thanks for reading and cheers to 2024!

As a quick – how’d you come to these twenty? – well, I took my list of everything I read in 2023, deleted anything I didn’t rate 5 stars, then deleted anything that was specific to writing (I read quite a few craft books this year) and then I cheated and made The Thursday Murder Club Series a selection when it’s really four books LOL. Then I listed them in alphabetical order by author first name because that was the easiest way to order them with the info I had to work with (an export from The StoryGraph).

2023 Year in Review

Frozen
Frozen

2023 came on stunningly beautifully cold. The river was so frozen the deer were walking across it. The ice fishing, I’m told, was fantastic. And I watched a webinar with Author’s Publish in which Emily Harstone essentially said, it takes ten rejections to get one acceptance, which birthed my #100RejectionsChallenge

I began furiously writing, editing, and creating short stories and essays I could submit for publication. (As it stands currently, I have thirty-eight pieces out for submission, I’ve received fifty-three rejections, and I’ve had four acceptances).

Meeting Artists
Meeting Artists

In May I created a Patreon account and attended my first writing retreat with Laura Munson and Haven. It wouldn’t be long before I’d begin the Montana Arts Council Montana Artrepreneur Program (MAP), attend the Authors of the Flathead Writers Conference, and Writing By Writers Manuscript Boot-Camp, rounding out a year of meeting other writers and artists and encouraging me in this audacious undertaking.

Publications in 2023
Publications in 2023

I sent my first piece for publication in June, nearly six months after I started my Challenge. I got my first rejection in July and my first acceptance in September. In the six months I’ve been submitting I’ve had four pieces published in three outlets.

Writing Presentation
Writing Presentation

October was insanely busy, marking one year I’ve been writing a monthly column for The Sanders County Ledger called Whatcha Readin’. I gave my first writing presentation and was asked by multiple people to turn it into a series of talks (the best feedback ever!). And I started recording monthly 2-minute book talk videos for my local Thompson Falls Public Library.

Unexpected Moose
Unexpected Moose

I saw a Facebook meme today where the poster was asking people to sum up 2023 with one word. My word would have to be “Unexpected.” If you’d told me in January of 2023 that by December I’d be an internationally published writer, that I’d have met famous writers like Laura Munson, Chris La Tray, Mark T. Sullivan, Gina Frangello, Pam Houston, Antonya Nelson, and Antoine Wilson I would have smiled, laughed, thanked you for lying to me. I still can’t believe it. It’s like this young bull moose that sauntered onto our property in May: Unexpected. Surprising? Yes. Wonderful? Absolutely. And mostly, thoroughly, unexpected.

SundayDutro
SundayDutro

I’m closing out 2023 by finishing edits on my memoir so that I can begin querying agents in the New Year. It has been an insane year and I’m so grateful to you all for joining me. I hope/suspect it’s only the very beginning of a fabulous ride….